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Social Manners for Children

By all reports, adults are becoming ruder, and children aren't learning manners either. 82% of Americans polled think children's manners are worse today than when they were children, and they're concerned.

In order to respect himself or herself, a child needs to learn to respect their parents first. Manners and respect are inseparable. Here's a great book to introduce your child to the subject of manners "What Do You Say Dear," by Seslye Joslin.

1. Start by modeling.

If you want your child to treat you with respect, then treat your child with respect. Your child must see you setting a good example.

2. No interrupting adult conversation unless dire emergency after the age of 3-4.

3. Addressing adults by their titles, not by their first names.

4. No throwing of temper tantrums when things don't go their way.

5. Teach one skill at a time.

Start with telephone manners, then progress to table manners, or vice versa.

6. Catch them doing it right and praise them.

Learning skills like these takes constant reinforcement, particularly if they are around other children who are unmannerly. Praise your child often (and specifically) even after they seem to have mastered it.

7. Be patient with lapses; it takes a lot of repetition.

Don't reprimand the child in public, however; this would be bad manners on your part.

8. If the child plainly forgets, you can ask a question which will prompt them.

If he forgets to extend his hand when meeting an adult say quietly, "What do we do when we meet someone older?" This gives the child the chance to be smart and remember and feel good!

9. Order a href=http://www.psow.com/manners.htmlModern Manners For Children, a mail-order program developed by the experts at The Protocol School of Washington®, for children aged 4-7.

10. Read some of the books available on manners for children. Here are some:

"Oops, Excuse me, Please," by McGrath
"A Little Book of Manners for Boys," by Barnes;
"Elbows Off the Table, Napkins in the Lap," by Wallace.

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(c) Susan Dunn, the EQ Coach, coaches clients and executives in emotional intelligence, and offers workshops, presentations, Internet courses and ebooks. Visit her on the web at www.susandunn.cc and mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE ezine.

If you would like to submit an article for publication here on the Mom To Mom Chat site, please send it in the body of an e-mail to robyn@momtomomchat.com.

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