Arming & Shielding - Preparing Your Child to Face a War

It's awful to think about, but war is staring our nation in the face. Scarred with the memories of September 11, your child is probably experiencing renewed uncertainty and fear. What steps should we take to prepare our children to cope with a nation in conflict? How can we keep them from dwelling on their safety and the well being of our world? As nations arm and shield themselves for the unthinkable, there are several ways parents should arm their children to deal with the realities of war, and while still shielding them as much as possible from a world in turmoil.

1. Arm them with security. Assure your children that they are safe. Iraq is far away, and it is very unlikely that your home will be a target of any hostilities. Talk about all the people that are in place to take care of us, including those in uniform, educators, religious leaders, and family. Don't forget to show your affection; there's nothing better than a hug to make your child feel secure!

2. Arm them with involvement. Help your child reach out. Let him send cards to people you know in the military, or visit http://www.militarymoms.net for information about how to send a greeting. Pray for someone in the armed forces by signing up at http://www.presidentialprayerteam.org/adoptatroop.php. Send monetary donations to relief agencies such as The Red Cross, World Vision, or SOS Children's Villages.

3. Arm them with knowledge. There is no greater fear than that of the unknown. Inform your child about the conflict at hand. Show her countries on a globe. Show pictures of the key political and military leaders. Explain the problems that have built up in the past. Talk about the economics involved and about religious and cultural differences.

4. Shield their feelings. Let your child talk. Allow him to be afraid. Listen when your daughter disagrees with your view about your nation's involvement. Find out what your child fears the most. What suggestions does your child have for solving the conflict? Talk about war, perhaps reading "Why is There War?" by Bob Fuller.

5. Shield their innocence. Be careful not to send mixed messages. Remember that children tend to see things as all good or all bad. No matter what your feelings on the war, in the line up of George W. Bush, Tony Blair, Jacques Chirac, and Sadaam Hussein, one stands out as the real bad guy. Don't confuse your child by dwelling on differences you may have with your country's leaders.

6. Shield them from too much information. Don't leave CNN on all day! Limit exposure to the news. Watch the news together with your child, but don't feed your family a steady diet of images of war and arguing politicians.

The world is an ambiguous place, full of soaring beauty and stark horrors. Children are one of the beautiful things. Let us all pray that they will one day know peace.

Kayla Fay is a freelance writer who spent 18 months in an SOS Children's Village, working with children whose lives were touched each day by war. Visit the SOS website at http://www.soschildrensvillages.org. She is also the publisher of "Who Put the Ketchup in the Medicine Cabinet?", a humorous yet informative look at life with ADHD/Inattentive Children. After 24 projects of their own, Kayla and her children have recently produced 24 Hour Science Projects. Both are availabe at http://www.goaskmom.com.